Book Review- Kyle Smith's Love Monkey

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I've read reviews heralding author Kyle Smith as the new Nick Hornby or a male version of Helen Fielding, but I felt he had much more in common with one of my favorite writers, Bret Easton Ellis. Love Monkey was a bit like Ellis-lite, as it had a lot of machismo and depravity in New York, but not in such excess. It was more Ellis in the characters thought than their actions.

The narrative is told thought Tom Farrell, a thirty-two year old  journalist, who exerts a great deal of energy just trying to get laid. His sexual exploits become muddled, when he fixates on a beautiful copy girl, Julia, who places him in the friends, occasionally with benefits, category. 

The story is entertaining and a quick read. I found it to be highly relatable, I completely get Julia and know guys that are just like Tom. 

SPOILERS BELOW

What's really well done is the way Smith highlights the differences in male and female thinking with regard to relationships. Julia is keeping Tom as a friend as she has multiple long term relationships with a few guys. She lets Tom take her out and they have the quasi-dates, but she keeps him at a distance while she is figuring things out with her various boyfriends. She is flirtatious with Tom, but always talks about her boyfriends.  She consents to let Tom touch her, kiss her in a teasing way, but only when she is between guys. She knows Tom likes her and it gives her a sense of power.

Tom is different. He professes his love of Julia to all of his friends and even to Julia, but he freely dates other girls at the same time. He is not going to wait for Julia and sees absolutely nothing wrong with having sex as much as he is able, with whichever women he is able. He wines and dines women that would be a great match for him, but won't commit further, because he wants Julia. He doesn't really love Julia, so much as he loves the idealized version that he has created in his mind.

 He complains that Julia is dicking him around, but in turn, that's what he is doing to the other women that are interested in him. It's a vicious cycle.This book serves as a reminder of why men and women who have an attraction towards each other, really shouldn't be friends. Julia and Tom torment each other, as they constantly keep in each others lives, even though they are both getting emotionally screwed. 

Book Review- Melissa Bank's The Wonder Spot

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I wanted to give Melissa Bank a second chance after being underwhelmed with her debut novel, but I found her follow-up, The Wonder Spot, to be equally underwhelming. This is not to say that the novel is without merit, as there are things that Bank does very well.

She doesn't write plot, she write slice of life and character sketches. This entire book comprised of slices of the main character, Sophie Applebaums, life. It's an examination of how a woman grows (or is stuck) as she develops relationships in her life. Again, this book doesn't have a big plot. It's almost like little short stories revolving around the same person. The lack of a forward plot or over-all arc, is a bit maddening and maybe if the character was more interesting, it would be forgivable.

Bank writes characters. She write real people. Sophie is entirely relatable, even if she isn't very likable. Unfortunately, I recognized much of myself in her character. The problem with making her so real, is it made the book a bit dull. This is not even remotely escapist literature or chick-lit. It's a character study. Sophie may feel real, but she is also not a very interesting person.

Neither are the other characters in the story. I kept getting them confused with one another, none of them made an impression.  This was the major fault of the story. I can handle the lack of plot and realism, if the characters give me a reason to care. Unfortunately, I just didn't care about any of them.

I want to like Bank, as she has a way of writing that is authentic. I just desperately want her writing to be more interesting. 

More thoughts on Matt Logelin's Memoir

I gave it some thought and decided that it would be best to write this separate from my book review of Logelin's memoir, Two Kisses for Maddy, because although the thoughts were prompted by reading his book, this is more personal.

i really loved how Logelin wrote the book for Maddy, as a way for her to one day learn about her parents relationship and just little quirks about her mother. As great as i thought it was, I could not help but be a little envious of Maddy.

My father died when I was four and it was something that we just didn't talk about in our family. The things that i know about my father and his relationship with my mom, are really just small tidbits. When you don't know a parent, these little bits of information take on a new level of importance and especially in my adult years, i have become obsessed with anything that i can find out.

So much so, that about a month ago, I had a freak out moment when I discovered a person had "claimed' my father's grave on findagrave.com and had written a bio on him with information that i did not previously know. It turned out, that the person was a distant cousin with an interest in genealogy. i calmed down and wrote her an apology for my angry and emotional email to her. she had not intended to be hurtful at all.  i really thought that she was stranger who had picked my father at random, a lot of those lurk on that site. it's weird.

There are some good reasons that we don't talk about my father, but none of these reasons are helpful to a kid trying to understand their roots.

It was never kept from me that my father had died. We just didn't discuss it at home. My mom had me in therapy, which i maintain was useless, except for that the therapist was married to a CEO at Baskin Robbins and would take me for a cone every session. She was nice and well intending.

in first grade, a classmate's father died. i clearly remember sitting at the kitchen table, doing homework and announcing to my mom that my classmates father had killed himself. i don't remember how I found out this information, but I remember telling my mom, because she then told me that's what my father did. It was a fact, thrown out in the open, but we didn't discuss it. i took the information and continued doing my homework.

in ninth grade, i discovered another piece of the puzzle when i found a binder with some paperwork. In the binder was a newspaper, the front page headline was regarding my Father's death. He had been having an affair, with a woman who had twin girls that were my age. My father and this women were drunk, he shot her and then killed himself. i never told my mom that I had discovered our big family scandal.

The idea that there are two twin girls out there that lost their mom the same night ,in the same scandalous, horrible way, is on my mind a lot. I wonder about them, specifically how they were raised in the aftermath and how they turned out. What if they live in my neighborhood and someday, through some circumstance, i meet one of them. i've thought about using this as the basis of a story and i tried to write it, changing around some facts, toying with the concept.

Growing up, i got some stories and facts about my father, mostly from my grandparents. The whole situation utterly destroyed my grandparents and they not only lavished a lot of attention on me, but tried to tell me good things about my father. All of these good things pretty much exclusively occurred during his childhood, before he became an alcoholic. He liked to rescue stray animals and kind.  When he was a teenager, he was a champion bowler. I have pictures of him with endorsement deals from bowling ball companies. My parents met at Jewel City bowl in the 50's.

My mom never talked about him much, but occasionally things would trickle out. They lived in Germany and Virginia when he was in the military. Their song was "Don't Sit Under the Apple Tree" by The Andrew Sisters. He liked dill pickles. He was an introvert, which i am too. Sometimes my mom would compare me to him in an unflattering way, mainly in attempts to bully me into attending a social event. "You remind me of your father" was never a good comparison.

So, I get why it was hard to talk about my father in a positive light. He was destructive and hurt many people, including himself. Although, I can't help but be a little jealous that Maddy will get to have so many facts about her mother. The facts seem to be a way to have a relationship and develop feelings, even when the person is no longer around. it's impossible to know how to feel about someone so fundamental to your life, when you don't know much about them.