Oklahoma City Trip 2017- The American Banjo Museum

After an emotional morning spent visiting the Oklahoma National Memorial, I switched gears and headed to the American Banjo Museum. The American Banjo Museum is located just feet from the hotel where I was staying, but due to road construction, I had to take a longer route under a freeway bridge and through the back parking lot.

The back -

The Front -

When I was purchasing my tickets, the very welcoming woman working at the front entrance asked me if I was a musician. After talking with her, I learned that this is primarily a musicians museum.

I am not a musician.

Furthermore, I lack any talent in the music department. My paternal grandparents were both very musically inclined. My grandfather was actually a musician, composer, and conductor. He worked in Hollywood and in various orchestras around America. His specialty was the clarinet and if you play the clarinet, you might have even used a product that he invented. During the second world war, my grandfather invented a plastic coating for reeds called "Plasticover." Pretty cool, right? My one attempt at an playing an instrument was the violin in third grade. I was so pitiful at it, that when it came time to perform for parents, I held the bow just above the strings and copied the other kids, rather than actually playing. Thus, my interest in acting was sparked! I also took chorus, but only the kind where they let any kid participate. I am absolutely tone deaf. No solos for me. I was always positioned away from the microphone.

So, why the American Banjo Museum? I've been answering this question posed by all of my befuddled friends as I've been telling them about my trip to Oklahoma City. I figured, why not the American Banjo Museum? I'm not exactly a huge banjo fan, but I like it well enough when thrown in the mix. I like blue grass, folk, and country music: where banjos make appearances. I'm someone who can find joy in learning, pretty much no matter what the subject, so why not learn about banjos? Mostly, I was in Oklahoma, I had limited tourist time, and it was close to my hotel.

I visited on a quiet Friday afternoon, where I was the only guest in the museum. The first set of exhibits, gave a background on the banjo with a short multi-media presentation. I learned that the banjo is a modified version of instruments that slaves brought over from Africa. The banjo was first played on plantations, but spread to white communities after the civil war. The height of its popularity was from the turn of the century to the roaring twenties, when it was used in jazz bands.

Here's one of the oldest banjo's in the collection. It's pre-civil war and unfortunately, it has an association with mistral shows.

When I mentioned the museum to friends, inevitably they mentioned the movie "Deliverance." There was a Deliverance nod.

Dan and I have a sizable collection of records. We don't have a record player, but we have a game where we go to record stores and try to find covers of inexpensive/bargain albums that make us laugh. One day we will buy a record player and have a party where we actually listen to what we have bought. Many of the albums come from the "World Music" and "Folk" sections. Here are some pictures of banjo albums that made me smile.

Of all the facts I learned about banjo's, nothing surprised me as much as what I read below. A lot of my friends rolled their eyes when I told them about going to the museum and I suppose it's because the banjo has a reputation for being "twangy", but at one time it was a very sophisticated instrument for the well-breed. Who knew?

As you would imagine, the American Banjo Museum has A LOT of banjos. I did a quick pass through the gallery, stopping to admire the intricate design work on many of the instruments.

You've heard of player-pianos? Not to be outdone, a player-banjo was created. Apparently it wasn't very good though.

There was a special exhibition featuring Roy Clark. I have to confess that I had never heard of Roy Clark before my visit to the museum. I learned that he is well-regarded as a banjo player, was on Hee-Haw, and seemed to be a humble man who is respected by many. He also favors elaborate bedazzled leisure suits!

My banjo education continued with Your Father's Mustache.

Your Father's Mustache is the name of a chain of 1920's themed nightclubs that began in Boston in the early sixties. Your Father's Mustache featured banjo bands and was the second most successful nightclub chain of the era. The museum has a mock-up of the club with retro signs and information. The way this is set up, I think they probably actually use this space for museum performances and events.

The museum hosts the Banjo Hall of Fame. I didn't recognize many of the names, but I took a picture of exhibit featuring "Georgette Twain: Queen of the Banjo," because she was one of the few women in a male dominated field and her dress is pretty!

I saw a banjo signed by FDR!

The museum is small and since I'm not a musician, I probably spent less time than a musician would have admiring the instruments. It took me about forty-five minutes to enjoy the museum. If you're in the Oklahoma City area, I highly recommend visiting the American Banjo Museum. It's fascinating, educational, and engaging. Plus, it's only eight dollars for adults. A bargain!

I'll close with this picture of a snazzy banjo themed suit.

Oklahoma City Trip 2017- Oklahoma City National Memorial and Museum

I have to confess that when I found out that I was going to be visiting Oklahoma City, the only thing that came to mind was the 1995 bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building. That said, I didn't know much about the incident. While planning my visit, I was surprised to recall that the bombing happened in the mid-90's. I thought it was much more recent.

To put things in a personal perspective, I graduated from high school in 1995, just months after the bombing. The only news story that I have strong in my memory from that year is the O.J. Simpson trial. My senior year History and Government teacher used to bring a radio to class to listen to the trial. I remember him giving us busy work and letting us goof-off, so that he could listen to the trial. He definitely didn't prep us for the advance placement exams. I also remember being at Bard College and living in such a bubble, that I didn't know the outcome of the O.J. trial, until weeks after it ended. Although the Oklahoma City bombing was definitely huge news ( and certainly more important than the O.J. trial), any news took a back seat to my being a teenager and starting college.

This trip was short and I only had one full day to explore the city, so I decided that walking would be the best way to take in the sights. My hotel was less than a mile from the memorial and the weather was unseasonably hot for September. Hot and humid. I started my day of touring at 9am.

Just a block from my hotel, I found a bunch of painted statues. They reminded me of the angel statues in Los Angeles, where different artists decorated angels. However, in this case, the subjects of the statues were varied. They are like the angels in the way that they are decorated and that different artists worked on each statue. My favorite is "Tux the Penguin", which was sponsored by the zoo.

The architecture in Oklahoma City is a mixture of modern and historical buildings; new and old coexisting. I felt safe walking around and everyone was very friendly. Several people said good morning to me on my walk. Oklahoma City has a nice, welcoming vibe.

Fifteen minutes into my walk, I reached my destination.

I didn't take pictures of the actual memorial. It didn't feel right to take pictures. I saw several people taking selfies; which seemed extra wrong. Memorials are sacred spaces. Before walking inside the gates of the memorial, I put my phone on silent and slipped it into my purse. I wanted to fully experience this place of remembrance and reflection.

The memorial is flanked on either side by two gates with open walkways. One side has the time 9:01 and the other side has 9:03. The bombing occurred at 9:02 am, which is the center of the memorial. There is an expansive lawn with a silver chair for each victim, small chairs for the children. The Murrah Federal building had a daycare center and most of the children had arrived for the day when the bomb went off. One hundred and sixty-eight people lost their lives, nineteen of which were children. In front of the chairs is a large reflection pool stretching between the two gates. Recovered stone from the Murrah building was used to create a wall on one side of the memorial. The other side is open, facing the museum, which was a building that housed a local newspaper at the time of the bombing. Over thirty other neighboring buildings were severely damaged from the explosion.

I felt somewhat stunned as I walked around the memorial. Again, having not remembered much of the news surrounding the bombing, I had forgotten than so many people had lost their lives, including so many children. I was overwhelmed by the scale of the destruction. It's stunning in light of so many terrorist attacks that have happened since Oklahoma City. No where feels immune. No where feels safe.

At the top of the memorial there is a tree. I did take a picture of the tree, since although it is part of the memorial, it was away from the main part of the memorial and felt appropriate.

This American Elm is known as the "Survivor's Tree." It was in this location long before Oklahoma City was developed and they have photographic evidence of it being on a family homestead in this site over ninety years ago. It has shrapnel and damage from the bomb, but it managed to stay alive.

Next, I headed to the museum.

Although it is free to walk around the memorial, the museum entry was fifteen dollars. It was well-worth every cent and I would encourage anyone visiting Oklahoma City to make the museum a priority.

The museum is self-guided and arranged in a way that allows visitors to follow a set path that tells the story of the bombing. It starts with an introductory video featuring Broadway star and Oklahoma native, Kristen Chenoweth. The theme of the video is: "A Day Like Any Other." From there, I learned about the Murrah building, its namesake, and the different government services that were housed within. There are exhibits placing the bombing in the context of the time period and introducing Timothy McVeigh's interest in the Branch Davidian Complex siege, in which McVeigh blamed the government for the deaths of the compound members. McVeigh planned the bombing for the anniversary of these events in Waco, Texas.

To root visitors in the morning of the bombing, we were taken to a meeting of the Water Board. This meeting took place in an office close to the Murrah building and was recording when the bomb exploded. No one at this meeting was killed or injured, but the sound of the recording is deafening. This plunges us into the minutes after the bombing, with displays showing items recovered and pieces of the building warped. Local new reports are shown on television screens. It's intense.

Next, we hear stories from survivors. Stories of co-workers helping each other and trying to account for every one. Stories of fire fighters and other rescuers. The most horrific story was of a woman visiting the Murrah building to pick up a social security card for her newborn. She was accompanied by her mother, sister, and two children: all of whom died. The woman survived, but was pinned under a beam that could not be moved. She was saved when a doctor used a pocket knife to amputate her leg with no anesthesia. Another story that really got to me was of a little girl who was kept home from daycare the day of the bombing. She visited the site with her parents and was interacting with a rescue dog, when she was overheard asking the rescue dog to "Please find her friends." I was crying in the middle of the museum when I read that, it's heartbreaking.

The story switches to the hunt to find the bombers. Crazy enough, Timothy McVeigh was arrested thirty minutes after the bombing when he was pulled over for not having license plates. Furthermore, the arresting officer found a loaded gun and knife on him. He was still in custody when they figured out that he was connected to the bombings. The museum even has his getaway car on display. Displays feature the hunt for other suspects, such as Terry Nichols, who helped build the bombs, but who was not in Oklahoma City at the time of the attack. McVeigh was executed for his crimes, where as Nichols got a life sentence for every death without the possibility of parole. Also involved were married couple Michael and Lori Fortier, who knew about the planned attacks, but said nothing. They corporate with authorities in exchange for a lesser sentence. Lori was not charged and Michael served about ten years before going into the witness protection program. The Fortier's plea deal was a huge controversy.

The building that houses the museum also sustained damage during the bombing and to illustrate this, they sealed off a former men's restroom that had been destroyed in 1995. It is left just as it was after the bombing. It's amazing to see this time capsule and to imagine how much worse it was on the federal building.

The last part of the museum is dedicated to the victims. It's a single room with each victims photo in a shadow box with items that their family members chose to represent them. For example, it might be a toy or a cross. There are several Precious Moments figurines. One thing that really stood out to me in all of the displays, in all parts of the museum, is just how dated everything looks. In my mind, the 90's feel like they were just yesterday, but looking at all of the technology and artifacts made me realize that it was a long time ago. Many of the pictures of the female victims were "Glamour Shots." Remember those? So popular in the 90's.

Taking in all of these pictures is a heavy enough experience, but when I was there, a woman about my age came in with a man to show him a picture of her dad who had died. I think they might have been newly dating. It was a very intimate, incredibly sad moment. I left the room to give them privacy.

The Oklahoma City National Memorial and Museum is such an intense and moving experience that I would say it's worth making the effort to visit Oklahoma City. The overriding message of the memorial is one of forgiveness, hope, and kindness; all things that we could use more of in this world.

The Ricochet: A Storyteller Show

A few days after my 40th birthday in August, I was approached by my friend Ryan to see if I'd be interested in performing a story for his live show/podcast - The Ricochet: A Storyteller Show. I was honored, excited, and a bit nervous.

I love to write and tell stories, but it had been over twenty-years since I had performed in front of an audience. The last time I did any type of speaking in front of a crowd was at both my aunt and uncle's "Celebration of Life" parties in 2013, which was an emotionally charged experience. Quite honestly, speaking at those events felt like an out-of-body experience and I can't even remember what I said. Oddly enough, when Ryan told me the theme for the show, the only story that I could think of was one that involved my aunt and uncle.

Here's how The Ricochet: A Storyteller Show works: there is a theme of the night and each story must be true. To keep it family friendly, performers are asked to keep their stories rated no more than PG-13 and they have a ten minute (give or take) time limit. Here is where I need to publicly apologize for running over my time limit. Nerves got the better of me, but thankfully I allowed to finish without an interruption. This wasn't the Oscars, no music played me off stage.

I participated in the second show of the series, which took place on September 22, 2017. The theme was "You Think You're Pretty Smart." It was held at the McKinley Design Studio in Oklahoma City, OK. My friend Ryan's studio is an amazing space. It's filled with handmade replica props from television and movies, really incredibly detailed stuff! I was a little nervous when I saw Negan's Lucille sitting near the doorway. I felt that it might be a not-so-subtle warning to keep us storytellers in line! Seriously though, if you need something crafted (including furniture), you should contact the McKinley Design Studio. For the event, the main space was filled with folding chairs for audience members. I'm not sure on this, but I'd estimate that the space could hold about seventy-five people.

Including myself, there were six performers, which have been split on to two podcast episodes. Although there is no requirement for the tone of the story, all of the stories ended up having humor. I laughed a lot and throughly enjoyed listening to the stories of my fellow performers. I went last and I was so engaged in the performances, that I wasn't focused on being nervous.

In order of appearance: Ryan McKinley shares a lesson learned about trusting fellow bandmates in junior high. Mr. X shares his intense need to collect physical objects from Disney parks, including the dicey operation to obtain his prized possession. Roger Colby wrote a poem about an unfortunate bathroom mistake that occurred during his finances wedding shower at a church. Jackson Compton talks about standing up to bullies, including turning the tables on a teacher, who might have been the biggest bully of all. Terre Pittman shares a very funny story about her dating and marriage disasters.

For my story, I spoke about "Thanksgiving 2010: The Worst Thanksgiving of My Life." I spoke about my uncle's health problems and dementia, which landed him in the hospital for that terrible Thanksgiving. My story was really about caring for someone you love with dementia and the trickery that is often involved to keep everyone sane.

Even though I ran too long during my actual performance, I did cut a significant amount of my original material. I initially wrote it out without editing myself and when I timed it, it ran twenty minutes. I thought I'd share some of what I had cut.. I cut background information about my aunt and uncle. This information wasn't essential to my story, but the time in which my story took place, they were older and in poor health. They were not acting quite like the aunt and uncle that I had grown up with and I was afraid that I wasn't honoring their memory by just sharing the 2010 image of them.

What was cut is that my aunt and uncle were amazing people. They were the life of the party, a fun couple. They were really solid friends, which is evident by not only how I saw them treat people when they were healthy, but by how many of their friends helped us out when they were sick. You can definitely judge people by the company that they keep and my aunt and uncle kept superb company. As a kid, I always thought of them as being super glamourous. They were each others second marriage. My uncle's first wife was soap opera star Linda Dano and my aunt was married to a Los Angeles coroner who worked on the Manson murders, among other celebrity deaths. Luckily they met each other, because I can't imagine having a different uncle. They married in Vegas and that night they went to a small club, in which Elvis was in attendance! Their lives just sparkled with cool things and interesting stories. Their glamour extended to their fashion choices; for better or worse, they followed every trend. I have strong evidence of this from our family photo albums.

I know that no one listening to my story who hasn't met them, has a clue what they look like, so here is a picture of them from the 1970's, decades before my nutty story.

And here is a picture of me on stage at The Ricochet: A Storyteller Show. Thanks to Ryan for taking the shot. I meant to take pictures of the space and my hosts, but I totally blanked that evening.

A huge THANK YOU to both Ryan and Shawna McKinley for not only inviting me to perform, but for flying me out for the show, putting me up in a great hotel, and taking care of me while in Oklahoma City. Thank You McKinley family for your generosity and hospitality! It was a fabulous opportunity and left me feeling even more inspired to write. Please check out all of the episodes of The Ricochet: A Storyteller Show and subscribe to the podcast. If you're in the Oklahoma City area or planning to visit ( and I highly recommend a visit, upcoming blog posts will feature my adventures in O.K.), check-out the schedule to attend a live show.