Cordella Magazine- "Belonging"

I’m thrilled to announce that my poem, “Belonging” was recently published in Cordella Magazine’s Field Notes. Please check it out here: Belonging.

I wrote “Belonging” several years ago, in Rick Bursky’s poetry course through the UCLA Extension Writer’s Program. It was a great class, really my first time writing poetry. Bursky was supportive and a wonderful instructor.

As a bizarre, “Only in Los Angeles” side-note, Francis Bean Cobain was one of my classmates. She didn’t call attention to herself, yet it was very clear to everyone that we had a semi-celebrity in our presence. The even more strange thing is, she is someone with whom I’ve always felt a bit of a connection, as two California kids who both lost their fathers to suicide when we were too young to remember them. I was sixteen when Kurt Cobain died, and I’ve always kept Frances Bean in my mind. Losing a parent, let alone to suicide, is a beyond shitty club that no one wants to be a member.

I finished at UCLA Extension in 2016, but didn’t start sending out my work for publication until Covid hit. It was very exciting when Cordella Magazine, a wonderful lit mag that supports women, picked up “Belonging” for its Field Notes section.

“Belonging” is loosely inspired by my former brother-in-law (first marriage), who was a landscape designer. He had a demanding client with a very fancy, expensive koi pond. Oddly enough, my sister-in-law from my second marriage is also a landscape designer. It’s definitely wonderful to have family members who create beauty in the world. I can’t remember the direct assignment for this particular poem, but I remember focusing on language and line breaks.

I’m simply very excited to see my work out in the world and I hope that you will check-it out.

Late Summer Road Trip 2019: Glacier Lodge

A top tip for traveling over holiday weekends: don’t wing it! We wanted to be spontaneous, so although we were traveling over Labor Day weekend, we did not make hotel reservations and it came back to bite us.

After a long day of seeing Death Valley National Park, The Museum of Western Film History, and Manzanar National Historic Site, we were exhausted, and we found ourselves in an area with few options. After calling around to local hotels with zero luck, we passed a highway sign for the Glacier Lodge.

It was the type of highway sign that businesses buy when they adopt a section of the road and they were absolutely thrilled that we called. Apparently, we were the first business that came from the sign. Glacier Lodge is a camp ground nestled in the mountains that offers a handful of rustic cabins. We were fortunate to grab the last available cabin, which had just been released due to a cancelation.

The price for one night in the cabin was akin to a suite at a luxury hotel. Demand was high and the prices reflected it. Still, we were grateful to have a place to sleep for the night.

When we checked-in at the general store to get the keys to our cabin, we were greeted by this intriguing piece of taxidermy.

To call our cabin rustic would be kind. I must repeat that we were grateful, yet, we certainly would never stay here again. We spent a restless night on a springy mattress and left before sunrise. I can’t speak for my husband, but camping definitely isn’t my thing, even camping in a cabin.

The camp was offering a special Labor Day BBQ dinner. I love BBQ and my favorite, pulled pork, was on offer. I chose baked beans and potato salad for my sides. Dan ordered ribs with beans, corn on the cob and a slice of watermelon. We had to wait for about hour for dinner to be ready, so we explored the grounds.

Despite my anti-camping stance, I still enjoyed the beauty of the tall pines and the rushing river. It’s a gorgeous location.

Waiting for dinner…it may have taken longer than an hour. I just remember being ravenous!

Finally, we were given our to-go boxes of bbq, which we enjoyed them in our cabin. The sun was starting to set and we didn’t want to navigate back to our cabin in the dark.

In the grand scheme of life our stay at Glacier Lodge was a memory building experience. We won’t return and we wouldn’t recommend it, at least not the cabins, although it might be nice place for tent campers.

Late Summer Road Trip 2019: Manzanar National Historic Site

I’m ashamed to admit it, but while planning our road trip, I had no idea that we would be passing by the Manzanar National Historic Site. As soon as I realized how close we were to Manzanar, I knew that we had to leave behind the fun part of our day ( Death Valley National Park and Lone Pine Western Film Museum) and confront a dark part of American history.

Shortly after the bombing of Pearl Harbor, President Franklin D. Roosevelt enacted “Executive Order 9066",” which effectively made the west coast of the United States a military zone. As part of this new zone, Americans of Japanese descent were considered a security risk and relocated to interment camps that were located in remote areas of west and mid-west states, ten camps in total. Manzanar, now a historic site of remembrance, was one of the camps.

Here is a model of Manzanar.

For over three and a half years in the 1940’s, over ten thousand Japanese Americans, mostly from the Los Angeles area, where sent here. Over a hundred thousand people were interned in the ten camps. Their experience was abrupt and traumatizing, with many families given only a few days notice to pack up their lives, leaving behind homes, businesses, and pets. This forever altered their lives, as many people emerged from the camps to realize they had completely lost the lives they had built. An apology and a small amount of compensation ( around $20,000 per person still living) did not come until decades later, during Regan’s presidency in 1988.

The visitor’s center has an affecting exhibit that allows you to follow the lives of specific people who were interned at Manzanar.

Visiting Manzanar is an emotional experience. I had a similar gutted feeling when visiting the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam and the Oklahoma City Bombing Memorial. It’s a solemn experience and I certainly cried. I didn’t take very many pictures, as I felt like being present in the moment and truly “listening” with an open heart was most important.

We visited in 2019, while Trump was still president. A presidency marked by inhumanity towards immigrants and separating families. At the time, I could not have imagined how much more rampant hate crimes would become in the US. In particular, the Covid crisis has created a surge in hate directed towards Asians. Visiting Manzanar was a strong reminder of what fear and racism brings if we do not stand against it. It also made me confront my own privileged place in the world.

Despite the sorrow and tragedy, Manzanar is also a place of great hope and humanity. Many of the exhibits emphasized the ways that those interned at Manzanar tried to stay positive and focused on creating a life in the camp. They held dances, arts events, and played sports. The camp had services and businesses, such as hair salons, a library, and a newspaper. Also, the American public was not unanimously in support of the camps, with many people reaching out to those interned, trying to help make their lives better or to be advocates.

After touring the visitors center, we were able to take a self-guided driving tour with stops at several of the cabins. We visited in September and it was scorching hot. The cabins were suffocating from the desert heat, but it also wasn’t hard to imagine how cold they could also be in winter., as they did not have heat or air-conditioning. The cabins were small and sparsely decorated.

This diagram shows the maddening circular form of questioning that Americans of Japanese ancestry had to endure to “prove” their loyalty to the United States. This was at a time with over thirty thousand Japanese American’s fought for their country in World War Two.

After visiting Manzanar, I wish that I had made the effort to visit sooner. The Japanese internment camps, along with many other uncomfortable aspects of American history, should be seen, remembered, and discussed. It is a bit off-the-beaten-path, but I feel that everyone should make the effort to experience Manzanar and the other camps. We need to have these difficult conversations, because truly this is not in our distant past, and based on the climate of our country, it is not hard to imagine something similar happening in our future.