Book Review - Courtney Robertson and Deb Baer's I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends: Confessions of a Reality Show Villain

Some people read smutty celebrity tell-alls when they're on beach holidays, but I read them when I have a cold. Getting sick gives me an excuse to curl up on the couch and watch the worst of reality TV ( I'm talking Toddlers & Tiaras and Sister Wives) or in this case, read trashy books like I'm Not Here to Make Friends: Confessions of a Reality Show Villain by former Bachelor contestant, Courtney Robertson and her co-writer, Deb Baer. This is as trashy as it gets people, trust me.

PLOT - Print model and Arizona native, Courtney Robertson decided to apply for the Bachelor on a lark, having a crush on former contestant, Ben Flajnik, a Sonoma Valley winemaker, who had his heart broken on the previous season. The show has a tradition of using runners-up to be the next Bachelor or Bachelorette, so Robertson was fairly certain that she would have an opportunity to fight for Flajnik's affections, if she applied. Sure enough, he was the next bachelor and Robertson was picked for the show. 

From the first night of filming, Robertson did not mesh with a majority of the other contestants. Her sarcastic sense of humor intensified and she quickly became the villain of the show, seeming cold and aloof, while further irking the other girls as Flajnik started falling for Robertson. Ultimately, she won the show and the engagement. After the show, their love life was less than romantic. Robertson reveals a different side to Flajnik, one that she experienced once the cameras stopped tracking their every move. She also exposes secrets and scandals of other contestants, while examining her own issues.

LIKE - This book was a fun read. Yes, it's trashy and a piece of fluff, but sometimes those types of books hit the spot. I've only watched two seasons of the Bachelor/Bachelorette and they both happen to be the seasons with Flajnik. My aunt was a huge fan of the show and there was nothing more entertaining than Courtney Robertson's snide comments. She played the character that everyone loved to hate. We didn't want her to win, but we certainly wanted her kept around, because she made that season a must-see. What I enjoyed about this book was all of the behind the scenes insight to the show, in particular how they film certain segments and the effort that goes into a big reality TV production, like the Bachelor. 

DISLIKE - I honestly would have thought that through this book, Robertson would have come across as more likable. She's wishy-washy, vacillating between the character of the bitchy villain and wanting to be liked. I do believe that most of what we saw on the show was her playing a character, but then this book just seemed like an extension of her wanting to continue her fifteen minutes of fame. I question her motives for writing this book. In many parts, it's as if she wants us to feel sorry for her and understand that she is really a nice person, but then she throws in really personal information regarding the hook-ups between various former contestants, which comes across as a really low-blow move. She also brags about her many Hollywood conquests, while saying that she doesn't want to reveal too much or hurt their image. Which is it?

She straddled the fence through the whole book and it would have been a more satisfying read if she just went all out in one direction or the other. Either make us understand the real you or just be that character that you created. It felt disingenuous to read this book, but not feel like I was getting a truthful side to Robertson. It felt manipulative and truthfully, I don't think that it was intentional. I think this split-personality story is more a result of poor writing and editing. 

RECOMMEND - If you're a fan of the show, yes. I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends is an entertaining book if you know about the other contestants and if you watched the seasons. If you've not seen the show, it will be a confusing mess. This is really for the fans. 

Book Review- Becoming Sister Wives

I am completely fascinated with the Brown family and am not ashamed to admit that I love their reality show. When I saw that they had written a book, I immediately downloaded it on my Kindle and breezed through it in less than twenty-four hours. It's a very fast read! This book doesn't have stellar writing. I assumed that the Browns had help writing the book, but it doesn't come across as slick or professional. It reads very much like a self published book written by people with zero writing experience. Maybe this made me like it a little more, giving them kudos for doing it themselves. I'm not sure what the truth it and can't be bothered to investigate.

The format bothered me a bit. The book rotates between Kody and his wives, each taking a chapter to discuss a particular topic, like how they came into the marriage and how being on a reality show has affected their lives. It made the read a bit tedious. I would have preferred it being written interview style and if the story had included the opinions of their children and friends.

Setting aside the writing and format, the Browns have an interesting story and they have put themselves at great risk to tell it. I am from a very small family and growing up an only child without cousins, I find large families to be intriguing. I also love reading about fringe groups and cultures that are different than my own. This is what makes the Browns so appealing, the are definitely outside what would be considered the norm, but in many ways, they are no different than the average American family. If they had not come public, many of their neighbors and coworkers would have had any idea that they practice polygamy.

One message that was repeated throughout the book was the idea of patience and understanding in a marriage. I felt like the Browns gave great relationship advice garnered through their years of being a family. This advice could apply to any type of relationship- couples, friends, relatives. The idea of listening and learning what another person needs and knowing that all needs might not be the same for every person. In creating a strong foundation for any type of relationship, you need to listen to a persons needs and then meet those needs with understanding and compassion. The Browns all echoed the sentiment of striving for their personal best and always working towards that never ending goal. A big part of reaching that goal is connecting with each other and their children, making sure everyone feels loved and a vital part of the team. I know that many people will write off the Browns for their beliefs or the fact that they are on a reality show, but all of that aside, I felt like the book offered some great advice towards being a better person. The Browns are all very clear that they are far from perfect and have many faults, but I think this makes them more sincere. This isn't an advice book and it's anything but preachy, it's just a family telling their story and what works (and doesn't work) for them.